How To Deal With Change

Change naturally happens this time of year. You may have seen change in your job, relationships, or personal life. Maybe your attitude and how you view certain situations has shifted. Even if you feel your life has been unaffected by change, a close friend or family member may have experienced a great deal of change, which will in turn affect you.


Typically, change doesn’t feel good. Your routine is broken and inconsistency is brought into your life. Because of this your emotions can shift to fear, anxiety, anger, confusion, or frustration. You may feel out of control and out of balance.  There’s a simple remedy that will help you to feel better.


First, look at the facts. A change has occurred and you’re feeling off because of it. The task at hand is to feel better, and get your life back on track. Below are three simple steps that will do just that. I’ve made them simple, because simple is do-able. And do-able means you’ll be able to stay consistent. 


First, take notice of how you feel. As soon as you sense that you’re not feeling so good, ask yourself “How do I want to feel?” Our bodies all have a built-in alarm system, our emotions. Our emotions are our body's way of signaling us that something isn’t right. Our emotions won’t lie; they’ll tell us exactly how we’re feeling in that moment. It’s our job to pay attention. 


When you get the signal from your emotions that something isn’t feeling right, that’s your cue to ask yourself, “How do I want to feel?” This may sound obvious, but how often do you really pay attention to how you feel? Most of us will tolerate feeling uncomfortable. Usually it takes a physical ailment, or an accident, to get our attention. That’s exactly what can happen when we don’t pay attention to our emotions and how we feel.  


Next, find an activity. Ask yourself “What will it take to feel the way I want to feel?” If nothing comes to mind, I’ll give you a hint. As children we all knew instinctively how to nurture ourselves. No matter what your childhood was like there was something you did to nurture yourself, something that felt good. This was something you did all on your own. What’s the very first thing that comes to your mind? Can you translate your nurturing childhood activity into an adult nurturing activity? Or maybe you would like to do the same activity as an adult. You now have a nurturing activity that you can do to make yourself feel better.


Finally, it’s time to take action. You’re going to take action to achieve your desired state. That action will be a version of your childhood activity. You’ve done this activity before and enjoyed it, so you’ll be able to do it again with no problem. Do your best to be in the moment and enjoy what you’re doing. Even if you only have five minutes in your schedule, enjoy those five minutes completely and thoroughly. Being in the moment is key. When you’re in the moment, you are using your intuition, not your mind, just like you did as a child. When your thoughts are in the future or the past, you’ve stepped back into your mind, which may not feel so good. The point here is to feel good. You’re taking charge of your emotions, as well as your mind. Remember yourself as a child doing your nurturing activity. You were in the moment and completely enjoying yourself. 


You can’t make change go away. Change is inevitable, it’s a part of life. When change happens, the key is to watch your emotions. It’s your body's way of signaling you to do something. The moment your emotions go to a negative place, take action. Even if you only have five minutes, enjoy those five minutes completely and thoroughly. 


Change naturally happens this time of year. You now have the tools to remain in control and centered, no matter what degree of change you’re dealing with. You’ll be able to think more clearly and feel better through the process of change. Stay consistent with your steps, and you’ll have no problem handling whatever changes come your way.


Deborah Koan January 17, 2018 @06:44 pm
You are welcome. Thank you for your comment Lucy!
Lucy January 17, 2018 @04:51 pm
Thank you for this. You are right, there is such change this time of year, and we need to be in the moment and not let our mind (EGO) take control. We need to let the change happen and just take care of ourselves and trust.
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